I Hear the Drums Speak!

But What Are They Saying?

Sing in Broadway Voice: “It’s OFFICIAL! It’s Official! It couldn’t be any less Superficial!” Bernard is NOW, a World Wide Internet “Common Tater”! A talking Spud! With Butter! And salt. Hmmm! Yummy! And beady little eyes!

Now I’m gonna get my 15 minutes of FAME! Tick… tick… tick… Splorp!
Damn! Are they up? Quick, hit the Snooze button, or the Floozy Button! I want 9 more minutes of Fame!
Bam! Bam! Bam! There, that should keep me famous for a while longer!

Reporter: “Do you think we could get Chief Talking Thunder to come out from his Tee-Pee?”

“Absolutely not! The Chief is in Deep Talks with his brother, Chief Thunder Cloud, and with his distant cousin, SisterChief Big Moon Bottom! And he is contemplating her Moon, I mean, her Bottom, I mean, the Moon, and her wonderfully full Stars! But he will come shortly, because he is preparing a Big Speech for his Tribal Brothers!”

Reporter: “Am I a Tribal Brother?”

“Yes, My Son, and Daughter! We are All Tribal Brothers!”

Reporter: "But what Tribe are we?"

"The Human Tribe, my son! Or, as they say in New Yawk City, the 'You-Men' Tribe!

Reporter: “Kill the lights! We gotta wait for the Chief ! One hour dinner break!”

Signed,
Little Thunder


© 2007. by Bernard Drums!

Real Legal Disclaimer: This masterpiece is a work of Fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Fake Legal Disclaimer: Extreme caution is urged when using the information and exercises contained in this fiction. If medical problems appear or persist, the reader should consult with a health care professional. Erections lasting longer than 4 weeks should be reported to the authorities immediately, because you might be a sex offender! Or call a pharmaceautical company, and ask for the “Special Studies Department”, and request to speak with the “Head” Mistress of Busyness and Assministration.

Down Boy! “Aw, gee, what a Party Pooper! I can see a lot more from Up Here! Uh, oh, Here Come dee Tunnel! Sploosh! Eeee-Yowww! WATER RIDE! Oh, BOY, let’s put her in REVERSE, and DO THAT AGAIN! I’m really wet now! But it’s so soft, and warm! Back this Bad Boy up, Sonny, and let’s do it again! Man, this is just like Night and Day!”